Thursday, 2 June 2022

Surfacing after sinking

Today I surface for the first time in several days with new hope to move forward. The power of gratitude has been instrumental in helping me find a new path to survival.

It doesn’t often happen that I plunge into darkness. Even though I’m constantly aware of the abyss, writing always soothes me and helps me cope, but lately, I find writing to be the last thing I want to do. As soon as I begin writing, I lose interest. It’s as if I’m feeding whatever drags me to the edge unknowingly.

And yes! This time, I not only made it to the edge! I toppled over into the pit of depression.  

The fight within wasn’t there for the first few days. No matter! I’ve surfaced, and that’s all that really counts.

I found this on Facebook today, and it made me decide to sit down and write and push through until I have something concrete to share! So, here’s another blog entry with a little more than just my own work to share.

Reflections of Me

As I sit here with my memories and wonder how I survived. The love I thought would be mine forever was lost. In what seemed to be in an instant, you changed into someone I did not recognize. And yet, all I can see are the "Reflections of Me" that you said made you change.

The hands that once caressed me, soon created pain. The voice that was soothing with the sound of love, would scream with hate. The eyes that held the look of love, were filled with contempt. The heart that was once mine, would beat for another.

The changes that you say I caused, you made sure you reminded me of them everyday. Me, the unworthy, the one who doesn't deserve you. Yes, I see the "Reflections of Me" through your eyes but one day you will see the "Reflections of You" in mine, and then you will see who was the unworthy one.

Margie Watts ©

What I’ve learned from this Facebook post is this:

We all have our own burdens to bear, and we all struggle to survive. We are empowered when we read about another person’s hardship and inner strength to move forward.  

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