There is no-one on Earth like you

You are unique. What you have to offer the world is rare and that adds value to who you are.

You weren’t born by accident. It doesn’t matter who your parents are or what led to the fact that you were born. If your birth was not meant to be, you would not be here reading this article. Knowing that you are here, alive and able, means that you are living a life of purpose. Everyone has a purpose.

Your main purpose on Earth is to survive. This purpose is energy-driven because throughout the day there are constant transitions between potential and kinetic energy as your body uses chemical energy to survive.

Your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual energies are represented by an Aura-energyfield that surrounds your head and entire body (extending 1,2m – 1,5m all around you). So, yes! You are a source of abundant energy. You are amazing!

Your Aura vibrates and when you are healthy it is bright and consists of different colours and shapes. When you are unhealthy (physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually), your electromagnetic field of energy seems to become depleted.

How is an Aura-energy field possible? The molecules, atoms and cells in your body consist of energy particles (electrons, protons, neutrons, and tinier particles) that vibrate. These particles vibrate in their nucleus and generate a small electrical impulse in your body, which forms a magnetic field around your body.

When you think about electromagneticwaves in the air around you, you will realise that they too are invisible to the human eye. Your body is an authority that is aware of these things because every system in your body is designed electronically. Your cellular metabolism and your heartbeat are mere examples of this.  

Your passion is linked to all this energy and your Aura. If you are passionate in life, you will have an abundance of healthy energy and a bright Aura. By focusing on your strengths you will have a positive attitude. You cannot ignore your weaknesses. You have to recognise and address them so that you can continue to grow as a healthy and energetic person.

Don’t become obsessed with seeking your purpose. Being here is purposeful. Even if you don’t understand why you are here, doing what you are doing, remember one important thing: there is a bigger picture. In the here and now, you can only see part of your life’s picture. You have to live in the moment and live to your full potential so that you contribute to this picture. It may not seem as if it is making a difference now, but in the future you will have played a significant part for something or someone else.

Absolute time is a man-made concept. It is not perfect and the measurement of it is subject to human error. So, be patient. Never wish time away and never wish time delay. Everything is relative and what will be, will be. While you are here, live your unique and amazing life to the best of your ability. Work on being healthy. Work on being positive. Work on being energetic. Be passionate. Be happy. Everything you need is within you.    

You don’t have to keep up any appearances. You don’t have to wear a mask or pretend to be someone you aren’t. You are who you are, a truly remarkable person. Accept who you are. Love who you are. Just being you is meaningful and there’s purpose in your presence.

Being Passionate, Having Purpose

Many teenagers have absolutely no idea what they want to do once their school career is complete.

The career they choose should be something they're passionate about doing. I love to write, for example. When I say write, I mean holding a pen in my hand and writing. It has nothing to do with writing creatively. Yes, I love doing that as well, but simply put, I just love the act of writing. I chose teaching because it entails a lot of writing. Teaching English as a subject just makes it so much better; I get the opportunity to teach students how to write an essay or any other creative piece.

We all need a purpose in life. Our passion should form our purpose. Without a goal or plan in life, we will end up moving in many directions, but progress will be slow. When we enjoy doing something and we make it our career, we will always enjoy working.

The point is not to be busy. It doesn't matter where or with whom we are working. What matters is that we do what we like doing. It makes us feel good about ourselves. If we feel happy and useful, and we're committed to what we're doing, we will always be driven to succeed. We will look forward to going to work every day. Of course, we'll get tired and yes, there will be days when many obstacles will dampen our mood, but in general, life will be worthwhile.

A lot of people feel they don't have any purpose in life. They don't know what they're passionate about. Their negative attitude robs them of happiness. People who have a negative attitude need to change their way of looking at life. We can try to share our perspectives with them and, with a lot of patience and time, even get them to see things differently. If they are willing to listen and they're prepared to make the necessary changes, they'll find new direction. The truth of the matter is that no-one can really help them unless they want to be helped.

None of us are born with a passion or a purpose in life. As we grow, we meet people, attend school, learn new things in every subject that is taught to us and experience many things. We are constantly changing. We not only learn in the classroom, but also on the sports field, at choir practice, church, in the mall or at home. Our personalities are shaped as we discover what we enjoy and what irritates us. The difference lies in learning to strengthen our likes.

The secret to discovering our passions lies in being active. Whenever opportunities arise, we should participate and discover whether or not we enjoy doing whatever it is that is presented to us. If we avoid doing things or continually procrastinate, we will never get to know who we are and what makes us happy.

Many teens tend to look at what their peers are doing. They try to imitate others and listen to the suggestions of teachers, family and friends. No-one can make a decision for us. No-one can tell us what our passion or purpose in life is.

We need to find out what makes us happy and follow through on what we believe is the right direction towards success. Only then will we be free to enjoy our goal-directed and purposeful lives passionately.

Know Thyself

Depression and anxiety are part of many people's lives. They've definitely been a part of my life. What I've realized though is that neither depression nor anxiety is a disorder. 

What I now understand about depression and anxiety is that both are surface manifestations of imbalance. These manifestations are deeper than the symptoms I've been experiencing every day. The truth of the matter is, I don't have to live with depression or anxiety ... and neither do you.

Most of us worry about worrying. We're anxious about our anxiety. It's a vicious cycle. The more we worry about worrying, the more anxious we become. The more anxious we become, the more we worry. In the end, we become depressed. Our health is affected because we don't get enough sleep. We crave eating, mostly unhealthy food. We lack exercise and are overwhelmed by our emotions, feeling unloved.

The day-to-day struggle makes us feel as if we have no purpose to move forward in life. The root of the problem lies in the fact that most of us do not know ourselves very well. We don't know what it is we desire, what we are chasing, what we want, what we need or where we're going. Not knowing leaves us feeling uneasy and disconnected.

Every day, we are surrounded by people. We all wear masks – different masks for different people. We're too afraid to be ourselves. We're too afraid of ourselves. In this confused state of anxiety, we make choices and live with the consequences. More often than not, we regret the choices and the consequences.

Where does it all end?

We need to identify the people, places, activities and our own thought patterns that trigger depression and anxiety. We have to believe that we can change how we feel so that we don't suffer any longer. Napoleon Bonaparte said, "When you fight, fight as if everything depends on you. And when you pray, pray as if everything depends on God." We have to fight against negative influences constantly and learn to focus on the positive things in life.

We have to have that much faith that when we wake up in the morning, we have the power to rely on ourselves, and when we climb into bed at night, we rely on God. This doesn't mean that we don't need God during the day. It simply means, we know ourselves well enough (our strengths and our weaknesses) that we can cope confidently with who and what we are.

It takes time and God to make a life. We can't make a life if we don't know who we are. We need to find "quiet time" in every day to be with ourselves, to get to know ourselves. The more we know about ourselves, the more we will be able to endure ourselves. We'll find an inner calm of acceptance and once we have that, we will have conquered depression and anxiety.

So, go on. Get to "know thyself" ~ Socrates.

A Walk Back in Time

Was it Confucius that said we should study the past to define the future? Well, it's true.

I turned 48 today. Quite a remarkable age, I think. My father passed away at the age of 48. (To be honest, he died on the 5th of August, 1990. He would have turned 49 on the 20th of August, 1990.) I remember how much I wondered, at the time, what 48 must feel like. I was 24 going on 25. To me, 30 was the ideal age - probably because Jesus was baptized around that age. So, I thought 48 was still a very young age. 

I've reached my dad's age. I now know what 48 feels like. Given another 11 months, I'll know exactly what he could have felt like at the age of almost 49, had he not been ill ... I've been pretty emotional about reaching this age. Since I turned 46, I have often wondered how long my life will be extended. 

I do believe we are all here on earth for a specific purpose. I'm not sure what my purpose is other than teaching and making an educational difference in a teenager's life, but, while I am here, let me continue doing what I do.

One thing I will never forget about my father was his passion to broaden our horizons. He used an atlas from Readers' Digest and encyclopedias back then to sharpen our minds. When we came to South Africa in the '80s, he took us to the Voortrekker Monument in Pretoria. 

Some of the few things I remember are:

• the long drive up the steep hill to the top;
• the climb up the stairs to the top of the monument;
• my father's fear of heights, making us stand back from the edge of the balcony, not allowing us to look down; all we could do was admire the view of Pretoria.

My wish for my 48th birthday was to take my family to the Voortrekker Monument. They have never been there. There's a new entrance to the monument, so the drive to the top was short and not as steep. My children's reaction to the monument made my day. They really admired it for what it was. My son said: "This place is awesome." There's an elevator inside, which takes tourists/visitors to the top now, but I made my family climb the stairs. When we got to the top, I stepped forward and looked down from the balcony to the garden below. I'm proud to say, I don't share his fear of heights.

 

I have always tried, in every possible way, to enrich my children with knowledge, much like my father had done with me. Going to the monument made me appreciate him. He died at a very young age and my children do not know him at all. My eldest child was born two years after his death. I tell them a lot about him. I think, in more ways than one, I am a lot like him. So, I have the opportunity of showing them who he was through my words and deeds. 

Our visit to the monument today was a walk back in time, but it defines the future. One day, perhaps, my children will take their own children to the monument ... and history will repeat itself. 

My husband is a year older than me. It was his first visit to the monument, too. I'm glad that I was able to take my family there and share a part of our cultural heritage with them.

"You educate a man; you educate a man. You educate a woman; you educate a generation.” ~ Brigham Young.

Study hard ...

"Study hard, for the well is deep and our brains are shallow." ~ Richard Baxter, The Reformed Pastor

This is the beginning of a whole new adventure. I have decided to study further at the age of 47 almost 48, give or take 13 days.

I am not sure whether I am insane or mentally deprived of something, but here's to the next 24 months!

Your religion or mine?

In life, we experience many things. Life offers us a great variety of opportunities and whether we grab them or not, nothing ever really stays the same. One opportunity leads to another just like one choice leads to another. We’re permanently living the consequences of our choices, constantly learning and constantly changing.

Our thoughts and our viewpoints change over time. We get a different perspective of certain things and gain a new understanding. Eventually, there is a change in our emotional state and our beliefs. We evolve. We grow. Most people don't allow themselves to change. They keep experiencing the same old problems, patterns, issues, responses, reactions, and hold the same old grudges. They reason: “I was born like this; I will die like this” or “My father was like this and I am like my father”.

The society and world prefer it that we don’t change. Society wants the average person in the ordinary world to be consistent. There’s so much pressure on us to be like everyone else. While we are always concerned about what others think of us, we need to ask: What is it that other people do for us? They want us to conform to their way of thinking and be like them. They constantly judge us for who we are. Worst of all is that the majority of people believe they are better than others. (Who decided that one life is worth more than another?) We have all been created to live here on earth and we have been created with differences. We have different needs and different perspectives.

A good example to look at is religion. There are many religions on earth today because of changed viewpoints and perspectives. When we look at our own religion, we see that it too has changed in many ways over time. Our religion was given to us by our parents. From a very young age we were told by them what to believe and we accepted their teachings without any questions. Some of us feel a sense of instilled guilt when we believe otherwise so we don’t change our beliefs and refuse to consider other religions. In fact, we tend to look down at other religions quite unfairly and with prejudice. 

Most of our actions spring from our behaviour. Our natural behaviour is simply an automatic response system. It is based on what, how, and how much we have been taught. Religion is a programmed behaviour. It's not the name of a building or the choice of religion that determines our faith. Faith remains within our hearts because God reads hearts and not the names of the churches we attend.

Change is inevitable, but while we live our lives - filled with many opportunities and differences - we need to learn to live with mental flexibility and accept other people as they are without forcing change upon them. We also need to respect other people for who and what they are.

Living Menopausally in Denial

I'm turning 48 in October. I really don't mind because I've never had a problem with my age. I've lived my life well and I have no regrets. With age comes a lot of problems: mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally. I know I'm aging, but sometimes I'm not aging very well. My body and my mind tell me many stories.

I've had many debilitating experiences with headaches. What upsets me the most is the fact that my doctor continually refers to them as stress-related. I love the way most doctors I've seen want to blame all my health problems on stress. Yes, I do suffer from a lot of stress. I've done that my whole life. I was a little girl, 7 years of age, when I had terrible nightmares because of stress. My father wanted to send my sister and me to boarding school. Whether or not it was just an idle threat on his part, it had an adverse effect on me. So, I know what stress is. I grew up with it. I also know what fear is. I've grown older with that as well. Prior to moving to South Africa, I never really had many fears. The ones I remember are minor in comparison to the ones I developed in this country. So, I find it difficult to believe my headaches are stress-related.

I was about 20 years old when I had my first severe headache. I remember I had to lie down and cover my eyes with a towel to block out normal daylight. Throughout my life, I've suffered from these headaches. I've had what some refer to as auras, but my doctor tells me I don't suffer from migraines. They're tension headaches. He says my stiff neck is the reason for the visual problems, so they're not auras. He also says the stiff neck is the result of tension. I always thought the headaches caused the auras and the stiff neck. What do I know? I'm told to drink anti-depressants. I never do and eventually the headaches pass for a long time. Then they return. Meanwhile, I am always stressed.

Now that I'm older, the headaches are different. In fact, they seem worse. I have burning sensations in my head and three different types of pain.
"They're tension headaches."
"Could it be my hormones, doctor?"
"No! They're tension headaches."

Is my doctor living in denial of menopause? I do not know. What I do know is that I'm sick and tired of these headaches!