My faith should carry me through

Even before I awaken every morning, my mind is aware of the pain and heaviness with which I'm burdened.

Still, I rise.

I get out of bed carefully, make sure I can sense that I’m standing, and then shuffle off slowly to the bathroom, using the walls and furniture as support. Never once do I think of staying in bed. My heart is always at school, with the children and the work that I have prepared so carefully for each day.

By the time I have dressed, eaten breakfast, and gathered my things for school, the adrenaline has me in the car. Nick drives me to school every day because I’m not allowed to drive anymore.

When I get out of the car and walk into the schoolyard, I pretend to be okay – in case someone is watching. Then I climb the stairs and walk into the staff room, ready for the staff meeting, twenty minutes before it’s due to start. I greet Rienie (she’s always there first) and sit down with a sigh. I watch my colleagues walk into the staff room. I especially look at their feet.

I never sit down to teach and my timetable is quite full. So, standing for eight teaching periods is the order of most days. When I hear the last bell, I always sigh with relief. Then I try to walk to the front gate and get into the car without attracting too much attention. I climb in and Nick’s empathy is evident.

Most of my afternoons, I sit. Then, I try my best to help with dinner. Most of every evening, I sit.

After a relaxing bath before bedtime, Nick starts to massage my calves and feet. He knows exactly what to do to get rid of the heaviness and it helps to ease the pain. It’s the only way I’m able to sleep.

I fall asleep almost immediately. Sometimes I sleep for an hour. Sometimes I sleep for two hours.

I wake up as soon as the heaviness and pain return. It’s very hard to fall asleep again, but eventually, after hours of lying in bed, I do.

Wednesdays become slow days. Thursdays are an effort. Fridays are my special days in hell.

The doctors have said that I can’t continue teaching. I can’t imagine sitting at home wallowing in self-pity all day.

My faith should carry me through, but my mind makes me stumble. The insecurity of not knowing what will happen next makes me suffer another day on my feet.

…

One day, I will have no pain. I will walk, dance, run, climb, jump and skip without effort. Until then, I can only pray for the strength to endure.

Myers' Cocktail

My GP told me about the Myers’ Cocktail in November and I decided to try it on the 22nd of November, to see if it would help for the pain in my feet and legs (for Peripheral Neuropathy). 

What exactly is a Myers’ Cocktail?

“The Myers’ Cocktail works by increasing the blood concentration of several essential vitamins and minerals beyond that which can be achieved when supplementing orally. For example, Vitamin C given intravenously has been found to reach blood concentrations more than 50 times greater than what can be achieved when given orally.

The idea is that many illnesses and conditions are associated with digestive disturbances such as bloating, indigestion and food sensitivities and that people with such conditions may not absorb many of the nutrients needed to return them to good health. Also, many diseases and inflammation cause the body to use nutrients at a faster rate, or to require higher amounts for proper healing. When nutrients are given intravenously, the digestion is bypassed. ADDITIONALLY the levels in the bloodstream are temporarily increased so that the nutrients are “coaxed” into the cells, and frequently into the mitochondria where they are active. This temporary boost frequently “kick-starts” the cells, so that energy is produced more efficiently in them.

Some patients feel an energy boost lasting days or weeks. In the case of fibromyalgia, decreased pain can be observed. In other chronic conditions such as rheumatoid arthritis and ulcerative colitis, because the “leaky” nature of the gut, the infusion helps get necessary nutrients into the cells. Chronic asthma and other lung disease, congestive heart failure, and chronic allergic problems may respond with more energy and less symptoms. Patients who get sick often with infections may find an improved immune response, with less susceptibility to viral illnesses. 

A small catheter is inserted into a vein, and the infusion is given very slowly over 20-30 minutes. Side effects are remarkably rare and almost always are limited to local irritation of the vein. The most common sensations are heat and flushing (a magnesium effect), and the taste of vitamins soon after the infusion begins. The cocktail is usually given 1-2 times per week, and beneficial effects are usually felt by the fourth visit. Many patients with chronic conditions choose to continue the infusions every 1-4 weeks or when they feel their energy slipping.”

Source: https://theremedyroom.com/2014/01/what-is-a-meyers-cocktail/

How did I respond to the “cocktail”?

After receiving it, I was in bed for three days. I had a severe migraine and was nauseous most of the time. It did not ease the pain at all.

Will I go again?

No!